Who is the lead singer for Van Halen? Think deeply on this one, and answer in reference to the Van Halen of 1983. While you are ruminating, also ask yourself, Are the first 10 minutes of a live show REALLY the best time to offer a drum solo?
Well, the answer surely is not David Lee Roth, the mangey chicken on the stage too winded to crow, "baby won’t you look my way." It’s MICHAEL ANTHONY (FAT ASS) singing all the damn songs!
Van Halen live sucks. They used midgets on stage. They played "nothing songs" for half the time, shit you don't ever know or want to hear. And Roth's performance, even in 1983, was like Axel Rose's at the MTV music awards in 2003 -- sucking air, and therefore shit, pointlessly. And worst of all is the banter with the audience, which allows Diamond to resuscitate himself: "Southern California is THE BEST! I just can't believe how GREAT you are. Let me hear how GREAT you are!"
And check your piss: I went and bought Van Halen's first album with my brother in 1978 and even learned Eruption on the guitar in 1984. That's how fucking stupid I am.
But the albums are cool. Fair Warning was my favorite mall walking album.
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1 comment:
ha-ha! "check your piss!"
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