Thursday, November 30, 2006

The Future of Fucking

Question of the Day:
"The ejaculate coming forward is a significant part of a man's sexuality. And, by the way, what happens if there is a breakthrough ejaculation?"

Answer here!

New Techmology:
"Krause's team ( is developing a type of spray can into which the man inserts his penis first. At the push of a button it is then coated in a rubber condom."

Come here for more.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Talk Talk, Sex Sex

Women talk three times as much as men, says study

By FIONA MACRAE Last updated at 13:39pm on 28th November 2006

[T]he simple act of talking triggers a flood of brain chemicals which give women a rush similar to that felt by heroin addicts when they get a high.

"Women have an eight-lane superhighway for processing emotion, while men have a small country road," said Dr Brizendine, who runs a female "mood and hormone" clinic in San Francisco.

There are, however, advantages to being the strong, silent type. Dr Brizendine explains that testosterone also reduces the size of the section of the brain involved in hearing - allowing men to become "deaf" to the most logical of arguments put forward by their wives and girlfriends.

Dr Brizendine says the brain's "sex processor" - the areas responsible for sexual thoughts - is twice as big as in men than in women, perhaps explaining why men are stereotyped as having sex on the mind.

Or, to put it another way, men have an international airport for dealing with thoughts about sex, "where women have an airfield nearby that lands small and private planes".

Studies have shown that while a man will think about sex every 52 seconds, the subject tends to cross women's minds just once a day, the University of California psychiatrist says.

Thursday, November 16, 2006


You may have read about this couple doing some “dirty touching” on an airplane, for which they were arrested on charges of terrorism. CNN: “According to court documents, flight attendants saw Persing and Sewell kissing, embracing and ‘acting in a manner that made other passengers uncomfortable’ while the plane was stopped in Phoenix.” AHN: “Persing was also observed with his face pressed against Sewell's lower body.” Against what?

The FBI’s Affadavit is far more interesting, and might have been used to inject some narrative interest into Snakes On A Plane: “PERSING was observed nuzzling or kissing SEWELL on the neck, and around the collarbone in the vicinity of her breast. PERSING was also observed with his face pressed against SEWELL’S vaginal area. During these actions, SEWELL was observed smiling. Upon witnessing this activity, FA-1, while PERSING had his face against SEWELL’s vaginal area, instructed PERSING and SEWELL to end this activity. . . . Observed by a passenger in a nearby seat, PERSING pointed and shook his finger at FA-1 and said, ‘I am going to give you one warning to get out of my face!’ Persing repeated this statement to FA-1.”


Saturday, November 04, 2006

Mission Accomplished!: Cheney's Say-Nothing, Do-Nothing Buzz Words

Readers are fully aware that I fucking hate plans ad libitum cum willy nilly. I CANNOT FUCKING STAND POORLY EXECUTED PLANS!!! ARRRRRRGH. When I hear Dick Cheney yarn on about his administration’s PLAN for Iraq, I immediately wish to perform a rear naked choke on the fucker and induce his imminent cardiac arrest for the good of the nation.

"We've got the basic strategy right," Cheney said. “It may not be popular with the public — it doesn't matter in the sense that we have to [YES, WE’RE WAITING, WHAT’S THE PLAN?] continue the mission and [WAIT, REPEAT THE PLAN AGAIN?] do what we think is right. And that's exactly what we're doing," Cheney said. [GOOD PLAN!]

"We're not running for office. We're doing what we think is right.” “I think there is no question that it is a tough war, but it is also the right thing to do," he said. "And it is very important that we [IMPORTANT THAT WE DO WHAT? WHAT’S THE PLAN?] . . . complete the mission." "They [democrats] haven't offered up a plan, but they have several different positions — withdraw, withdraw at some future date, cut off funding," Cheney said. [THEY HAVEN’T, IN OTHER WORDS, REPEATED “COMPLETE THE MISSION” A MILLION TIMES.]

"The fact of the matter is, this is the right thing for us to be doing. We need to succeed here. It has a direct bearing on how we do around the world on the global war on terror."

Somebody please impeach this fucker.