1. Teenagers are gay; their subculture is mainstream culture, which sucks, from the Hot Topic "alternative apparel" to nü metal's latest steaming piles of shit.
2. Teenagers should be hated; their parents equally suck for spoiling these fucking monkeys and not smacking them as they should.
3. Teenagers are stupid ("hardcore begins with Slipknot"; see Exhibit A).
Appendicks:
Exhibit A:
Watch this. You'll love it!
Exhibit B:
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